Zombeavers review: obviously isn’t high art, but it delivers just enough of the gory insanity

With Halloween fast approaching, my fellow Culturedemandsgeeks ventured onto Netflix to find a suitable horror film to watch…

Well, as soon as ‘We’ saw Zombeavers advertised the streaming platform I  er, I mean we had to watch it.

Zombeavers a 2014 American horror comedy film directed by Jordan Rubin, based on a script by Al Kaplan, Jordan Rubin, and Jon Kaplan. The film follows a group of college kids staying at a riverside cottage that are attacked by a swarm of zombie beavers (huh, you heard correct, Zombeavers!)

First and foremost: “Zombeavers” is exactly what it sounds like, a stoner-friendly horror-comedy about undead beavers. This needs over-stating since high-concept humour doesn’t get higher than this. Rest assured, “Zombeavers” could have been great—for what its title promises. If you give money to see a film “Zombeavers,” you will get what the title promises. For some, that may be enough. For others… (please fill in the blank).

This film is entitled ‘Zombeavers.’ Think about that for a moment. Cute little woodland animals turned into bloodthirsty undead beasts (who then go on to plague the living hell out of three scantily-clad young maidens).

Ready?

Shall we start!

It’s all down-hill after two Cheech-and-Chong-esque schlubs, played by song-writer John Mayer and comedian Bill Burr, make inane (but funny, in an unclean, midnight-movie kind of way) small-talk about, amongst other things, their dalliances with homosexuality (“I hear a lot of myself in this story”). They then have an accident, and a canister of hazardous chemicals is accidentally let loose on an unsuspecting population of beavers.

Shortly after this, a trio of bithy best friends, including Mary (Rachel Melvin) and Zoe (Cortney Palm), retreat to a nearby cabin in the woods in hopes of helping one of their own—Jenn (Lexi Atkins), the sympathetic one—get over her unfaithful boyfriend Sam (Hutch Dano). But Sam catches up with Jenn, and brings along best buds’ Buck (Peter Gilroy) and Tommy (Jake Weary), Mary and Zoe’s respective boyfriends.

Then zombeavers strike and cue mayhem erupts like a volcano on an isolated Pacific island. Mary and Zoe have sex while Jenn has an argument with her unfaithful boyfriend. When Jenn goes to the bathroom, she is attacked by a beaver but Tommy kills the animal that appears to have rabies. On the next morning, the group goes swimming in the lake and they are attacked by zombie beavers.

Will they succeed to escape? (we hope they didn’t escape from the floating raft.)

Spoof movies are becoming a lost art. The problem with these movies is that for every one joke that hits, there are a hundred that miss. Why? Because they’re doing the same sh*t over and over again.

ABOVE: Rex Linn, Jordan Rubin, Rachel Melvin, Jake Weary, Cortney Palm, Peter Gilroy, and Lexi Atkins at an event for Zombeavers (2014)

BEST PART:

There was a lot of campy dialog but two of the funniest conversations is Smyth the hunter and Myrne Gregorson. I applaud Rex Linn for his over the top “creeper hunter” Smyth. His role might be a bit part but his conversation with girls was funny.

CONCLUSION:

The film’s creature effects are its best selling point, all claws, buck teeth, and milky-white, pupil-less eyes. They’re not consistently well-used though, especially in scenes where they’re lurking in shadows, waiting to attack. The first time this happens, they look like off-brand Muppets.

This film is daft and, most importantly, it knows it is. It never tries to be serious and never tries to be anything but what it is – daft, silly fun.

“Zombeavers” is the kind of comedy whose greatest innovation is in its title, a play on words that suggests both a flesh-eating dam-builder, and a deathless female body part. That joke is tellingly flogged like the proverbial dead horse throughout the film. If you like your films dumb, daft, insane after drinking a few bottles of wine, and having a wispy plot, then this film is just for you.

Or perhaps Peter Jackson’s early comedies, particularly “Dead Alive” and “Bad Taste?” 77 minutes may not seem like a major time commitment, but trust me: you can do a lot better than “Zombeavers.”

Stars: 3/5